The Defibrillator Toaster
My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”
“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!! NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”
He’s bread, Jim.
Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M
If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast!
“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”
I WASN’T EVEN GOING TO REBLOG UNTIL I SAW THE SHIT TON OF PUNS
HES BREAD JIM
(Source: secretsbest, via alittleplaceicallmy-sanity)
if my ceiling fan could hold my weight I’d never be bored again
Yeah… Cause you’ll be dead.
(Source: drarna, via thew4yiseeit)
Falling in love
this is like, the most perfect photoset ever
so simple. so perfect. i was always taught not to execute your more emotional ideas in a studio setting, but i honestly find it works better. they always work for me, at least. this is amazing.
(Source: razorshapes, via fortunatemind)